If you’re trying to blow your own face off and fall into a sewer for comedic effect instead of earning a playoff berth, you’d have to give the Vegas Golden Knights an Emmy for their performance last night. The Knights needed almost every point they could get to pass the Dallas Stars for the last wild card spot in the West, and after missing their chance to catch a really unassuming Kings team for the last automatic spot in the Pacific , the Knights had the easy task home win over the San Jose Sharks. A Sharks team that played in San Jose the night before. A Sharks team that hasn’t played for months. A Sharks team that is already on the golf course.
Vegas controlled most of the game pretty well and looked damn comfortable leading 4-2 with three minutes left. Maintaining a two-goal lead for just three minutes, a fairly elemental task for any team maintaining oxygen uptake, would have resulted in a winner-take-all of sorts in Dallas Tuesday night when the Knights travel there to to play against the stars .
Then the following happened:
And then this happened in the most hilariously hilarious and satisfying way to everyone outside of the knights’ platoon:
Of course, the Knights weren’t done with their act of self-immolation. You have a power play with 1:37 left in OT. While 4v3 power plays aren’t a guarantee of a goal, if you’re as desperate as the Knights against a team that’s running out of time again until summer break, you should take advantage of it. Vegas managed a few prayers from the deep that didn’t bother James Reimer. Then they failed to beat Reimer on penalties, took just one point when they needed two and now need to lead the table on the road in their last three games to essentially have any chance of reaching the postseason.
Of course, the Stars could take it out of their hands by picking up four points in their last three games, all at home. Even if they don’t beat the Knights on Tuesday, they’ll face the Coyotes and Ducks on Wednesday and Friday to complete the tournament. Those are two other teams who have been suffering from senioritis since at least February. Or in the case of Yotes, forever.
There are certainly many problems for the knights. You’ve probably heard her screaming about injuries since training camp. Although that would have been less of an issue if they hadn’t eroded their depth (Max Pacioretty, Mark Stone, Alex Pietrangelo, Jack Eichel, etc.) in their search for the newest and brightest to hit the market that week.
Their goalkeeper was a mess that usually happens to any team that trusts Robin Lehner in important games. At the moment they can’t even decide if Lehner is injured or not. Lehner hasn’t been very good and has been injured this season, but it doesn’t take more than a weird look to wet himself over feeling hurt, either. That shouldn’t win any sympathy from coach Pete DeBoer, who handled the whole thing and his whole team liked a dead father. The Knights’ special teams have been spitting sputum all season, and while some of that can be traced back to goalies on the PK side, there’s no reason a team with this kind of firepower should look like five dudes looking to rejuvenate their driver’s license waiting for the power play.
And it should be noted that her prize claim this season, Acorn, has been dog shit lately. While the numbers look okay for him overall (21 points from 31 games), he’s been nowhere for the past week or so as the Knights played for their lives.
Last night, and it can’t be overstated that this was his second straight game against the Sharks, Eichel had an expected goal average of eight. That’s EIGHT. His Corsi rating for the night was 40 percent. And who were these industry titans churning out Eichel for the evening? Rudolfs Balcers, Noah Gregor and Thomas Bordeleau. No, they’re not the guys who make up the band opening for Kraftwerk on their reunion tour (yes, I know Florian Schneider is dead, but just walk here with me). Eichel had two shots on target and if you’re watching Timo Meier’s equalizer with 0.9 seconds left you’ll notice Eichel drifting into the far corner to chase a puck he never hoped to find just the spot reach and clear, which Meier would do score off.
Eichel has scored one goal in his last five games. That’s it. He also gets his balls nibbled off by everyone he’s out there against. His Corsi rating in the last five games: 37.2, 63.7, 39.5, 44.9 and last night 40.1 beer farts. Even in that one dominant game, the Knights lost 4-0 to Edmonton. His expected goalscoring rate in those five: 42.9, 60.3, 53.1, 12.8 (!) and last night’s incredible 8.
Eichel has time to save the Knights with great performances in their last three games. But things are not going in the right direction. His MO has always been to be at the helm of a ship crashing into the rocks. His BU team lost the NCAA championship game at TD Garden to a much lower-seeded Providence team. The World Junior Team he captained in 2015 (which included no fewer than 15 future NHL players, including Auston Matthews and Dylan Larkin) was thwarted by Igor Shesterkin in the quarterfinals. The year before, the US team also spit an acorn on it against Russia in the quarterfinals. Back then it was Andrei Vasilevskiy who did the honors at the guillotine. His Sabers didn’t even come close to making the playoffs.
The Knights thought Acorn was the last bit to get them over the top, even as they cut out more of the base to add it. Well, the boulder is rolling down the hill pretty hard right now, and Acorn’s tail is in the dirt.
